Shots Fired During Council Debate To Purchase Monkey

A shootout occured during last night's council meeting during an open debate concerning the Vinland's Zoo's desire to trade in the Zoo's current animal, a bull shark named Chompy, for a monkey. The request comes after a recent incident involving Chompy and the youth hockey team. The discussion became heated, and Councilman Joseph Morningcrown revealed a concealed weapon and began to shoot indiscriminately into the council panel after he was unable to get the attention of all of the council members while he expressed his opinion on the issue. Several council members drew weapons and returned fire. No one was injured, which investigators say can be attributed to the fact that all weapons used date to the civil war or earlier, and are all therefore highly inaccurate.

Moringcrown told the Vinland Valley News that his actions were motivated by his concerns that "dem monkeys pull yer face off." Morningcrown has been suspended from the town council for 2 weeks for initiating the incident.

This morning, Mayor Buttinger reversed a recently approved ordinance to prevent future incidents of this kind, despite promises of more restraint from the council members.